“You are such an inspiration! I check your Facebook every morning and love your blog. I wish I could get it together like you have it all together!”
I have it all together? Oh. Wow!
When I opened and read the message from a blog fan, I have to admit I smiled and looked around, and snapped a pic.
I’ve been mulling it over a bit.
A picture says a thousand words. This picture says a lot, and how I “had it all together” on that particular morning.
Me, in my jammies, kid crawling into my lap, dogs and toys in the floor.
I was comfortable. Comfortable in my hand-me-down rocking chair. Comfortable in my home. Comfortable in the little world I have created that is my typical day.
I had worked an overnight shift, an industrious idea that has pushed me to my physical limits. I welcomed the sunrise, headed home and welcomed the baby in for the day. My sweet-as-sugar grandbaby. My daily companion. My little bundle of love. The first of what I hope will be a whole houseful.
He kept me company as I made coffee, fed the dogs, made us breakfast. I changed into to my favorite long johns. Yes, long johns, but at least they are Victoria Secret. And fabulous. Certainly not what VS would walk down their runway, several years old, soft as a whisper, and great for the chilly morning. After all, I would be catching a morning nap by 10:00am. While the other night-shifters bed down for the day, I am grateful for simply napping with the baby. He is my priority, and working nights will assure our days together. What I work on at nights will change until I find the right fit.
I’m not sure what having it all together means. Example: I’ve stared at that sentence for 10 minutes. I was trying to decide between ending it with “anymore” or “exactly”. I decided to end it more simply. I’m truly not sure what having it all together means.
As usual, penning it down helps me to sort it out. Having it all. Having it all together. What is my all? Is it all together? Does it look all together? Who is looking? Am I helping? Inspiring? Is it more inspiring to share what helps motivate and inspire me, or to keep it real, and let my strivings inspire?
There are some things I know for sure. My family is my all. That is my “all”. Family is my all. If I need to work nights, drive 1800 miles, rob Peter to pay Paul, stay awake, lose “me time” hours by propping my broken feet up, make tough decisions, raise hell, raise kids, barter, get creative, love tough, love soft, defend, provide, protect, step back , step forward… It’s done. Period. Perfectly, no. Fiercely, yes.
I know I am creative. That’s part of my “all”. I know I’m a writer. I know I’m a project manager. I know I’m a homemaker. I know I am a volunteer. That’s more of my “all”.
I know the creative part of my all needs tweaking. I definitely do not have the media vehicle all together yet, but the process is so me and fun and I love it all. I’ll get there.
My Sweetheart Life is so me, so accurate, so widely focused. Because that, for me, is what life is all about. A wide lens look on life.
Trips, projects, holidays, hobbies, making memories, being present and open to life. Finding art, inspiration and humor in our daily life encompasses many things, a blessed many. When prompted to focus more narrowly, I simply can’t. That’s ok. That’s my all.
I do know that I strive to have it all together. And I am so much better at not worrying about it on the days I don’t have it all together. I know that I can share that part of my all with family and friends and we can laugh at the mess together.
Now that I think about it, that’s probably the key to it. All.